REVIEW: Small Town Folk (2007)

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The covert art of the DVD looked promising, unfortunately that was the only bright spot of this entire movie.

I came across this film while browsing for cheap DVDs at a Blockbuster that was closing down. I spent $6 on it and to be frank that was probably the same amount as the budget for this entire film.

Small Town Folk is a 2007 disasterpiece from the United Kingdom. It attempts to incorporate the eeriness that European settings give with an American hillbilly motif; imagine if The Woman in Black was shot in the American outback a-la Hills Have Eyes – totally incompatible.

As the title might suggest, the antagonists of this film are crazed hillbillies living in the rural areas of the UK – which would have been good except rural rednecks are an American feature, they looked very out-of-place in the European countryside.

If you’re thinking that this film would still be worth watching since it will feature the scenic view of rural UK, sorry to disappoint you but the movie was shot almost entirely with a green-screen. The piss-poor CGI used further added to my annoyance, it was almost as if the producers did not try at all.

I only watched twenty minutes of this film before I had to give my eyes (and my brain) a rest, and that may have also been the same length of time invested to write the script of this movie.

The story-line is as generic as you can get: as stated previously, it is about rural crazies who hunt down a couple thatĀ gets lost during a road trip. A contradiction on the other hand is the fact that while the couple were portrayed to have wandered somewhere really far and remote, shot simultaneously was a scene where a group of teens just casually strolled into the same area.

So was it really that remote or was there a town nearby?

The couple also sought help from a very unkempt-looking tramp, who didn’t say anything except devour a roadkill carcass of what appeared to be a squirrel when asked for directions. To further add to the confusion, a devious-looking leprechaun (yes, a leprechaun) appeared hanging on his back and then proceeded to give the most cliche ominous warning to the travelling pair.

Despite being warned by a leprechaun and his buddy, who both already looked like red flags on their own, not to enter a certain dirt road and to just stay on the main road our travelers still pursued it despite expressing concern that they were already lost.

First of all, no one in their right minds would do such a things which makes this plotline all the more unrealistic. Second, why was there a hotel deep in the forest where this dirt road was headed? That already sounds quixotic and even so, why would anyone decide to stay there?

I’m sure you can guess from my ramblings that I am not a fan of this movie. This review is to serve as a warning to anyone who fell for the same trap of picking up this DVD or watching it online because of the cover art.

Trust me, the cover art is probably where most of the efforts of the producers were expended.

You should steer clear of this film the same way our main characters should have stayed away from travelling in that sketchy dirt road. As for a grade, I give this a failing D-.

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